Question:
ok, so i am mixed race with black young woman who is planning on studying abroad in japan. i dunno why, but i do have an attraction towards japanese men, but they always blow me off because i'm "crazy" (dunno, i do have depression, plus they've all been players). so anyways, i was wondering if anyone here has been to japan who is not white because i always see white people depicted in anime and manga, and everytime i see a japanese dude he's either with a white girl or another asian girl. i have high expectations for this trip, but after some bad experiences with japanese people here in the us (guys, not girls), i have some worries, or anxieties. ANY advice would be helpful. thank you!!!
p.s. i am going to be studying in osaka, japan.most people usually go to tokyo, and i can't find any books on osaka, so has anyone non white ever been there? just curious... if you have been, when did you go and what was your experience? maybe eveyone's experience is different, but after meeting some sketchy people here, i am not sure what to expect exactly from people in japan. i do speak japanese at a profficient level, and i'm not bad looking. i'm really hoping to get insight before traveling over there.
Answer:
The Japanese guys you met in the U.S. were probably very untypical Japanese men. They were young, in a foreign country, and maybe even their parents were paying their way.
An average Japanese man is usually at work all day. So usually the problem for foreign women looking for a boyfriend/partner/spouse in Japan is they're all busy.
You've got to look at why you attracted the players into your life, because there are certainly players in Japan too. Not only that, but they're more likely the ones who'll be able to speak a bit more English than average too. (How else will they play?)
You're going to have to face that your skin colour is an issue in Japan. It's always going to be that way. When 95% of the people around you are yellow with black hair, you're going to stand out, and you know that already. So, you either accept that and have a great time, or you don't, and complain all day about how racist everyone is. I'd probably choose the first option.
I would say to change your views about men, because you're responsible for the type of men that come into your life as much as they are. There are plenty of decent men. Maybe they think YOU are the one who's "sketchy." Just something to keep in mind. I've spent many years in Japan, and I'm a guy, but I can tell you that there are all types of men in Japan, and I'd say that the majority of Japanese guys are really nice, cool people.
Learn some Japanese. Get into the culture. Study. Meet a guy at the library, at work, somewhere like that.
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