Question:
Hi, I'm 14, going to be 15, and next year I am going to be going to Japan on foreign exchange. I may go for up to a year, and although I'm very excited, I'm also worried that I may experience extreme culture shock and anxiety the first week or two I'm there. I've never been away from home for more than a week, and even then it was with my family, but going to a completely different place alone for a long period of time is bound to give a person like me troubles. Here are some things I'm worried about:
Packing: All I know is that to travel internationally, you're allowed to have 2 pieces of luggage, no liquids more than 8 (?) ounces, and no dangerous "weapons". What about a razor to shave? I can't live without shaving and I don't want to make it weird with my host family by saying, "Hey, I need a razor to shave." I don't know what they'll say to that. I've thought about wax strips, though I'd really prefer using a razor. And toiletries. My face wash is 6 ounces, will that be ok? And I heard that you should pack everything you need, then half it. 5 shirts for a year? Hmm... I don't know. I know most days you wear school uniforms so I guess it kind of makes sense. Also, you're allowed to take chargers and stuff right? Would I have to buy a little port because I read that in some counties, outlets are different than in America. Packing tips would be greatly appreciated.
Food: I am the world's pickiest eater. Literally. Lately I've been forcing myself to like Japanese food, and some of it I do like (especially Japanese sweets) but I don't want to eat something like sashimi and then end up throwing up. I'd feel terrible. And I know the Japanese eat lots of fish, which is fine, I don't mind fish, or making rice my staple carbohydrate, but then there's like, soy sauce which I absolutely cannot stand. And the Japanese eat lots of that. I can't eat stuff like cow either, because when I think of eating a cow, I want to throw up, seriously. I don't think that should be too much of a problem though, since that's not really popular in Japan. Again, any tips are greatly appreciated.
Leaving: America, that is. I think that once I'm settled in Japan I won't miss it too much over here, but like my last nights at home I might start feeling culture shock. Just thinking I won't be in my own bed or with my own blankets, and I won't hear my dog snoring by my feet every night kind of freaks my out. Ok, it really freaks me out. And coming back things might be extremely different. I know I visit my grandparents a lot, and they're both pretty old, what if I come back and one of them (or someone else close) isn't here to welcome me back? I'd spend the rest of my life thinking about how I wasn't there. My neighbor just died a few days ago and he was 62. It's the first time I've ever dealt with death, and he wasn't even very close to me. I felt highly shocked and very confused, like I'm never going to see him again. But when I leave, I'll probably become attached to all my American things and pack a bunch of my stuffed animals and end up over packing. Help is welcomed!
Sleeping: I am an insomniac. I have the strangest sleeping patterns and I either sleep too much, or I don't sleep enough. Usually, I fall asleep around 3 a.m and wake up at 1 p.m or before that if I don't sleep enough. I don't want to wake whoever up if I have to share a room when I get there. And to make it worse, I am a really heavy sleeper, so heavy, that sometimes people will try to wake me up and I'll only wake up when I hear something I want to hear. I heard that Japanese people tend to not like when people sleep past 9 a.m. That means huge problems for me. Please send your advice!
Connections: I don't know how often or even how I'll be able to contact my mom. I spend a lot of time with my mom, and people say that when you're on foreign exchange, you shouldn't talk to your natural parents. But me, I know that won't work, I have to know what's going on at home and of course I want to tell everyone what I'm doing. And the computer. I use my computer on a daily basis, but I don't think I'll be able to there. And my phone, I heard it's really expensive to get a cell phone plan that you can use internationally. I have a Verizon LG Chocolate Touch by the way, if that's any more useful to you. Again, any tips here would help a lot.
So those are my major worries, any and all advice will be seriously considered. Some people might say, "Well, with a list that long, you shouldn't even bother going" But I'm definitely going. I'm not going to let a few worries take advantage of an opportunity like this. It's normal, I suppose, and if you read all this, thank you!
Answer:
I commend you on all the research you seem to have done. I did a similar program when I was 16 so I know exactly how you feel and here are my thoughts:
1) Read the above post about packing. You only have to worry about liquids in your carry on, not your checked luggage. Also, understand that you will have to ask your host family for embarrassing stuff sometimes, its part of living with someone. I would take more than 5 shirts for a year, but remember that you will want to buy some new stuff while you are there. Also many people change out of their uniforms after school so you probably need a minimum of 10 shirts.
2) Food: While sushi is not a common food, you might want to let your host family know this asap. My family surprised me with sushi the first night I got there and I felt the same way as you do. however, understand that it is an experience. Just because you have tried something in America, doesn't mean you know what it tastes like. Soy sauce, for example, is usually mixed with mirin and sake or miso to make a really delicious sauce. So, give everything a try.
3) Leaving: I don't want to freak you out but this actually happened to me. When I went to Japan in college my dad passed away while I was gone. I had to fly back to my family. But then after I spent some time with them, I continued the program. The important thing is that, events like that will happen no matter where we are. It is just part of life. So understand that it is not something to be scared of. Its much more likely that you'll come back to find everything pretty much the same. But even if it is not, understand that that is not a reason to not go or to be worried. Just focus on getting to share pictures with them and tell them stories when you get back instead of being worried that they might not be there. Do take a small photo album though. It will remind you of home, in a good way and people will always ask to see pictures of your family.
4) Sleeping: You will have to change your habits. I am assuming that this is your weekend schedule cause you have to get up for school everyday. But, just try to go to bed early. Tell yourself in your head that it is time to sleep and don't let yourself think about anything else. Also, when you wake up and don't want to get out of bed, remind yourself that you are in JAPAN. There are tons of crazy things to see and do and learn. Get up!
From my experience and everyone I have talked to, you will probably not be sharing a room with someone. You will probably have your own room. If you do not and you insist on staying up, you might want to do it in the living room or something so you don't keep the other person up.
5) Connections: Whoever said you should limit your contact with your family in the US is dumb. You will have lots of emotions and experiences and you need to express them to someone who understands your native language. It is great to talk to your family and tell them all you are going through. They need to, in turn, support you and not just tell you to come home (one of my friend's families kept saying that) They need to reinforce you, even when you are upset. When I was there I bought a phone card (with my host family's help) and called my mom from the house phone as often as I needed to. They also gave me a cell phone on their family plan in case I got lost.
DO NOT TRY TO BRING A PHONE FROM THE US. It is a huge waste of money. It is much better to just get a pre paid phone there or use a family phone. Remember, if they are a good host family, they will treat you like their daughter and have all this already figured out for you.
Also, if you have a laptop and can bring it with you, skype is the best cheapest way to keep in touch.
You will not need an outlet converter.
Feel free to message me privately if you need anything else. I am also a Japanese translator so I can help you with any phrases you need to say as well.
